A few of my friends (guys) have pointed out to me that the way I am dating is NOT the norm. I have to agree. Usually, a person would date one person at a time until things run their course, then move on. Although I have nothing against this "normal" type of dating, there seems to be pros and cons for both dating techniques.
Dating one person at a time:
Pros:
1) Only one person in your life (intimacy)
2) A feeling of "being centered"
3) Focus of intent and outcome
Cons:
1) Only one person in your life. (yes, this could be considered a CON)
2) Might become serious sooner than you may want.
3) No backup plan
4) Attachment
Dating multiple people:
Pros:
1) Options on who to see and when
2) Less attachment if things don't work out
3) Variety
Cons:
1) Lack of intimacy ("just body parts rubbing together")
2) Unending feeling of urgency (I need more numbers)
Well, that is my point of view on it. I know that the multiple dating thing is not for everyone, but it serves its purpose until that "ONE" comes along. As stated in the last post, I'm only seeing one person at the moment. Unfortunately, I don't see it going anywhere serious. We have fun together, but that's about it. I'm going to have "the talk" with her about my thoughts on us dating because I think she is more into it than I am. I'll let you know how that goes.
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I find myself doing the semi multiple dating. Where you're really into one person, but you're TALKING to quite a few others. I find this helps me not get stressed out or turn into a ho-bag. (hormones are a powerful thing) It's a personal thing for me that I don't choose to sleep with everyone I date, and talking to my back-ups if you will, allows me to see if the option I'm currently spending my time with is what I want or not. If not, even then, sometimes I can just shuffle them around. Hang out with someone else, move him to the back of the line kind of thing. This method works best for me because I find that I have a hard time going out with "Tom" on Friday, and then "Harry" on Saturday. Hard to keep names straight if I spend too much time with too many. hehe.
ReplyDeleteI think dating one girl while you're completely single is not right. You're really limiting who you could be meeting. I don't think there's any reason to be exclusive with one person while dating. Just doesn't seem right!
ReplyDeleteI agree, Phildo. I believe that you should keep ALL options open until that one person comes along....that is IF that one comes along.
ReplyDeleteand when that one person comes along...then what?
ReplyDeleteGood question, Miss Adventures. Two times I THOUGHT I found the ONE. Believe it or not, I was also engaged once. Sometimes things just don't turn out how you think.
ReplyDelete"Then what", indeed.
I've tried both and it seems that I naturally gravitate towards dating one chick at a time and part of it is exactly what Alecia was saying about forgetting everyone's story. TWINGMAN76
ReplyDelete